Monday, December 11, 2006

Weird Guy or Super Spy?

There is an older gentleman that Bubba and I see Sunday morning's when we ride the bus to church. We call him Duane Reade Guy. We don't see him every Sunday, but almost. He gets on the bus the stop after we get on, and then always gets off at 70th Street and Broadway. There is a Duane Reade (that's a local drugstore for you non-New Yorkers) at that corner, and he ALWAYS walks over to 'window shop.' Always. He will persue the window display, which is usually non-existant because they just don't put anything in there but pictures, and that's just the beginning of the confusion. He'll walk the entire length of the store, then look in the windows at the closed Northfork Bank next door. This is his standard routine, never waivering, and he even gets very irate if the bus is late. He never goes in the store, just walks along the store-front from one end to the other, pausing to eye some particular ware. But, again, all of the Duane Reade stores recently took all their merchandise out of the store-front and there's just pictures of things you can buy there. So he can't be window shopping if there's nothing in the windows!

Bubba and I always watch him a bit bemused, and then try to figure out what the hell he's doing on a Sunday morning at 9:15, taking the bus from 103rd Street to 70th Street, just to look in the window of a Duane Reade.

  • Is he meeting someone? We never see anyone, but granted, we are on the bus that leaves promptly after he gets off, so we don't get to stick around and see what happens.
  • Did he use to live there and just likes that Duane Reade? But he never goes in!
  • Is he a child-predator and is waiting for the mommies to walk their kids by en-route to the park?
  • Does his estranged son/daughter work there and that's the only way he can get a glimpse of them? By staring in the window, pretending to be window-shopping in a window with nothing in it?
  • OR, is it a sign/signal that something has happened or is about to? Like in spy novels where the spy gets 'tips' from just someone showing up at a particular time and place. It always reminds me of The Sting: when the 'mark' walks across the street and down the alley, one of the characters is in an apt. across the street and rings the bell to alert everyone else that the 'mark' is on the way.


I think it's this last one, sheerly because it is the more entertaining idea and can lead our imaginations down so many different roads. Who knows? Maybe Duane Reade Guy is really affecting the stock market by appearing when his 'client' needs to buy/sell a particular stock! We could get him for insider trading! Or, or, or, he's working for the Mob! Or he's letting a kidnapper know that he's still around and working on the ransom money! The scenarios are endless! Fine Sunday morning fun for the remaining 10-15 minutes we spend on the bus before we get off ourselves.

Also just proves that the bus is WAY more fun than a taxi!

5 comments:

japruf said...

Maybe he's just going to church too, but is slightly neurotic.

Also, did y'all leave because everyone else arrived to late? joe said he thought he saw Joel but wasn't sure...

katielady said...

Yep. No one was there at 9:45, so we went to church.

cjh said...

I think Super Spy. That's more fun...

MikeV said...

I say spy, too. His contacts place a chalk mark X on the Duane Reade window. He goes every week to see if he needs to make contact that week.

Eddie said...

Totally super spy.